A Thing Called Joe

I’ve always marveled at the people that consider Sex and The City a “gay friendly” show. Don’t get me wrong– I love it. Always have. Even in spite of the fact that on the show gays are treated like accessories– just below shoes and handbags– and presented as either sheepish losers like Stanford Blatch (played by Willie Garson) or obnoxious queens like Anthony Marantino (played by Mario Cantone). But all that aside…. the show is over-the-top-fabulous and I have spent many a drunken conversation trying to decide which SATC wench I am (I’ve gone from a hopeful Carrie, to a reluctant Charlotte, to a quite comfortable Miranda).

The show ended its six-year run– dare I say it?– perfectly. The characters’ stories were all tied up neatly, and in some cases– very movingly. So when Sex and The City: The Movie came out four years later, many people thought it pointless. For my part, I enjoyed the film…. was a little pissed off at them messing with the characters’ happy endings– but whatever, they needed a film plot. But when, earlier this year, they announced the release of Sex and The City 2, I thought to myself, “No good can come from this.”….. And I was right.

The movie…. was bad…. for a thousand reasons. I, however, am only going to discuss one of them. And that’s because, twenty minutes into the film, I was left outraged. The opening scene shows our four ‘girls’ shopping for a wedding gift for none other than their trusty novelty-gays (as Charlotte says, “Her best-gay-friend is marrying my best-gay-friend!”). At this point I was happily thinking to myself, “Yay! They’re going to make a statement! The Gays love the SATC girls, and they love us right back!” My happiness didn’t last long.

I managed to look past the ridiculously stereotypical “gay wedding” scene (complete with swans, a sparkly top-hatted all-male chorus singing showtunes, and Liza Minnelli officiating over the ceremony), but when Anthony announced that in turn for him allowing all the gaudy glitz and wedding overabundance, Stanford is allowing him to ‘cheat’, I almost did a classic ‘spit-take’ with my five dollar Dasani water.

Granted, the four girls didn’t seem to approve of this arrangement and when Carrie confronted Stanford about it, he didn’t seem to relish it either. But with a sheepish shrug and a proverbial “What can I do?”, they swept it under the carpet and went back to talking about clothes. I thought that perhaps later on in the movie they would come back to the topic and have Stanford stand up and say, “No, this is not what I want! This is a marriage not a bordello!” But alas, it was quickly forgotten with the justification that every couple should be able to make up their own rules.

Now, if Samantha were getting married with the stipulation that she could ‘sleep around’, I would say, “Fine! Point taken. More power to ya’!” But at this time in history, when Marriage Equality is such a touchy subject, we should not be portraying “Gay Marriage” in a way that will give people another excuse to say we should NOT be allowed to marry. I agree– every couple SHOULD be able to make up their own rules. There are couples out there– gay and straight– that have open relationships, and if it works for them, that’s all that matters. Who am I to judge? But showing a marriage between two men that is founded on promiscuity, just gives people another reason to think that monogamy and homosexuality do not go together.

I don’t know– maybe I’m expecting too much from a show as frivolous and vapid as Sex and The City. But I find it interesting that back in the 80’s, before Marriage Equality was even an issue on the horizon, The Golden Girls dealt with the subject when Blanche’s brother married another man. The ‘moral’ of that episode was “Love is love. No matter what.” Now in 2010, Sex and The City in its cutting-edge, forward thinking, trend setting, infinite wisdom, gives us a new ‘moral’…. “Love is love. But if it’s love between two men, one of them is going to fuck around.” 

So glad I spent that $13.

Tags: anti-gay, gay marriage, sarah jessica parker, sex and the city 2